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During the time that I was really confronted with choosing a path for myself an obstacle I encountered were my parents and/or my family (depending on the situation). Whenever I talked to them about ideas I had and the things I wanted to do in life very, very often they would either just nod with an undertone of “What the hell are you talking about?” or they would actually voice their inability to understand what I was saying. This made me feel like all I wanted was so out of touch with reality and yet I still had this feeling of wanting to do those things.
Eventually I got so scared to tell them things. I felt so vulnerable and became super cautios of what I said, because I didn’t want to feel that rejection. It made me feel trapped and small and like I had to break out of something.
So I became silent. And whenever my closest ones started to ask about my plans I would always always answer very vaguely and change the subject as quickly as possible. Essentially what I did was that I distanced myself from them in the sense that I stopped talking to them about how I wanted to live my life.
Through that distance I was able to create space for myself (learn more about this at Conscious Living). That meant that I had more room to expand. To really lay out all of my ideas and see which ones I resonated with the most. It enabled me to try out different things ‘in silence’ without anyone really noticing. This way I didn’t feel the need to justify to anyone what I was doing. Of course, eventually, I wanted to show them what I was doing, but only once I was really sure about it.
And after a while they really stopped asking, because (I’m guessing) they noticed that I didn’t really give them an answer. Now all of that happened with an inner attitude of appreciation on my part. Because I was very well aware that their questions and their curiosity (or nosiness haha) came from a place of love and care. They just wanted me to be safe and live in a stable environment. I could really see that, reading between the lines.
See if this experience resonates with you. Do you feel like you are in the same situation? Maybe a bit of distance could actually be really beneficial to you.
Let me know how it goes: office@yllispace.com or @yllispace on IG
Lots of love to you,
Patricia